Benny! Bennyyy!

I got to drive a Commonwealth car on Tuesday. Tomorrow is my one year anniversary of working here (hip hip hoo freakin' ray) and I would have to say driving that car has been the highlight.

We were driving into the city to collect the goods for our Melbourne Cup Luncheon, and I volunteered to drive. I almost spontaneouly orgasmed at the feel of the car purring along the road. It didn't clunk and groan like The Bird™ used to. It glided down the highway like honey then roared into life when I reefed on the accelerator at the lights. I'm from Bathurst, you see, so driving like a hoon comes naturally to me.

At the supermarket I had great fun turning the car security on and off just because I could. Beep beep! Beep beep! I love technology. And the power windows! Took me awhile to get the hang of those. At one stage I was mashing the buttons with my fist and swearing as all four windows rose and fell insanely like glass gophers.

In my excitment to get back into the drivers seat, I lost my balance with the antipasto platter and ended up with fetta cubes and marinade all over my sleeve. Urgh.

We twirled through the dial on the way back and sampled the delights of Canberra commerical radio. Elton John Benny and the Jets, Little River Band Happy Anniversary, Billy Joel Piano Man, Foreigner Urgent , Lionel Richie Three Times A Lady and then again Little River Band with Curiosity Killed The Cat.

I reeked of olive oil and spices but I grinned like a fool as we glided back into the car park. Best of all, I didn't crash. Yay!

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Benny! Bennyyy! was published on November 9, 2000.

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