What Goes Around
It's been oh oh oh oh so long since there was talk of orgasms on this site. But as I scribble in my notebook it's Saturday 12.33 AM and, ladies and gentlemen, we have a newcomer!
What a screamer. I've never heard such a high note, sustained for so long, ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah, so relentless, so shrill. The sound has pierced through the windows and is pinging off the stone walls in the courtyard. You can hear the neighbours sniggering.
Back in my singing lessons we did this exercise where the object was simply to climb up the scale as far as possible. The strained noise escaping from my throat sounded like what I imagined it would sound if you threw a rock at a seagull in flight. My friend Jenny, on the other hand, soared and soared so high I thought her lungs would be sucked up her windpipe and fly out her nostrils. My singing teacher would have been proud of this girl tonight.
Wow. Only ten minutes later, it's time for the Second Act.
Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah!
My Body Combat instructor likes us to be noisy. He prowls around the class as we're puffing away, yelling "I wanna hear your SCREAM!". Which means when you kick or punch the air you're mean to give a "HIIIII-YAH!".
"You are warriors!" he bellows with a smirk. "You are fighters! You can take on any enemy... so long as there's a light techno beat in the background!"
But I find it so hard to coordinate the body and the noise-making. My roundhouse kick looks more like a roundhouse duck-with-a-broken-wing as it is, so when teamed with a scream it's inevitably all too difficult and I stumble into the mirrors.
After a fifteen minute interval, would you believe she's at it again? The very same note. I am in full admiration of the swiftness of her recovery.
One has to acknowledge that it is Festival season here in Edinburgh, and there are a lot of performers in town right now. So this could mean one of two things about my neighbour:
1. She's in the theatre. You know, like acting. Ah ah ah ah, my arse!
2. She's Brunhilde or someone in the Scottish Opera's performance of Wagner's Ring Cycle. That's 16 hours of singing all up. You'd have to have stamina for that.
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[riotous laughter] Always pointing out the interesting things in life, eh Shauny?
Maybe she's a...er..."paid performer".
We had one as a flatmate (!) for a VERY short time. After a while it changes from "she's getting very lucky" to "yeah, right!".
It is after all "peak season" over in Edinburgh - plenty of "business opportunities".
I better sign off before I die of an overdose of "quotes".
Scott F :)
Man, I wasn't thinking about _her_ stamina. 3 times in half an hour? That's inhuman.
"That's inhuman"
yep... as a new reader i am wondering wether this will be a frequent subject or if its a rareity.. or am i jsut prying?
Hey man, maybe she's just like me and likes the hoopy loopy.
Inhuman? I laugh at inhuman.
Foolish mortals...
Yeah, I was thinking that since there are a lot of performers in town right now that she might be entertaining a lot of them...
Either that or the motor on her Hitachi Magic Wand is gonna burn out soon.
Ach! Hoot mon! Hoot mon! Hoot mon! Hoot mon! Hooooooooooooooooooot mon!
Fabulous! Tickets available from the Fringe Box Office, then?
She's faking it.
Body combat? That really sounds like fun.
I'm sorry! I knew she was loud but I had not idea. The three times was my fault and I take total responsiblilty. I'll have a talk with her and see if we can't mute the finales somehow.
Half her luck. I'm resigned to being the crazy old single lady with too many cats.
Where's the "she's faking it" guy when you need him.
Shauna thanks to you I've developed this terrible fear of being...heard...We have to turn on the fan and the radio---and sometimes it's kind of cold for the fan.
However, I suppose you are helping me become a more considerate neighbor.
Hmmm, identical triplets taking it in turns? That would account for the apparent swift recoveries, and the vocal similarities. But I think other theories are more likely to be correct.
Anyway, isn't that thing about making noises when doing sporty stuff supposed to be to do with not holding back? Something to do with dropping ones inhibitions? Sort of so that it just happens by itself, rather than being something that one does in addition to the sporty fightingy stuff?
And dare I ask, given the subject matter, why "Wagner's Ring Cycle"?
LOL! Maybe she was just having really great sex, ever thought of that? :¬)
Nice blog!