The Eagle Has Landed

Until we saw her toddling towards at the airport this morning, I don't think we ever believed The Mothership would make it to Edinburgh. But there she was with her huge grin and ridiculous sunglasses perched on her head.

"I left the case in the car! So I've had these on my head all the way from Canberra! Ha ha!"

We expected tears aplenty after a year apart, but she just launched right into her usual blethering.

"Would you look at this shirt? I'm a bloody disgrace!" she pointed to various blobs on it. "That's lunch at Sydney. And here's my ravioli on the way to Singapore. And here's a bit of breakfast before we got to Heathrow. You know I've had TWO breakfasts today, they gave me another one on the way to Edinburgh. I got two bits of bacon, pork sausage, scrambled eggs, half a tomato and a bread roll. A stale bread roll."

Her suitcase wasn't hard to spot on the carousel - bright red and bedecked with multiple padlocks and purple gauze ribbons.

"You know the Nice Singaporean Businessman beside me couldn't believe this was my first flight outside Australia. Well it is, I said, indeed this is the first time I've exercised my passport. You know I was so paranoid about deep-vein thrombosis, I took my asprin and wriggled my legs but still I thought, that'd be right, I'll get off the plan and cark it."

We sat on the top deck of the airport bus as we headed into the city. She frowned at some grey houses with concrete gardens and asked casually, "So do you enjoy living here?"

Next she crowed at how green and old everything was. She read out shop signs, "Hollywood Tan Studio. Magnet? Is that like Magnet Mart back home? Another Hollywood Tan Studio? Sunday lunch only £6.50. Is that cheap? Saint Ninian's Church! Oh! I always wanted to have a son called Ninian!"

"Why?!"

"It's a beautiful name!"

We got off in the West End to catch another bus home.

"So girls, can you believe The Mother made it? Did you think I'd bail at the last minute?" Her teacher voice boomed across Lothian Road as we waited for the lights to change. "I'll tell you what I noticed on the flight and then at Heathrow, and that's all the healthy male specimens! My god, I've never seen so many hunks! Overseas is where the hunks are, I reckon. I thought to myself, there's bound to be some worthy hunks here for Rhiannon..."

"Mum, mum. Stop talking for a minute. Look up."

"Where?"

"There! That's the castle."

"That's Ennbra Castle!? Right there in front of my nose? Fair dinkum?"

"Yep."

"Well there you go," she grinned, "Ennbra Castle."

| | Posted in The Mothership | Comments (23)

 

Comments

1 · Jaynee said:

Sounds like you are in for a great time! I look forward to the (no doubt) hilarious updates!

2 · eeksypeeksy said:

Fine, happy stuff. How long is she staying? Are you and R. squeezing into one bed so she can have the other? What if she never leaves?

3 · Gordon said:

Ohh I'm looking forward to tales of her trip - but don't worry you post them once she's gone, don't want you to miss any time with her...

Mind you I'm sort of surprised she's real, she's almost an enigma... ;-)

4 · moocher said:

Oh my God - I think you've just described my mother. Right down to the ribbons on the suitcase to make sure she can spot it amongst all the other suitcases that look the same. Sounds like you're in for a fun time :)

5 · Helen said:

I've got a nephew called Ninian, neh neh ne neh neh!
Named after my Dad's brother who was a serious sweetie.

6 · Monkey said:

Weird to think of your Mum standing at that bus stop off Lothian road, perving at the construction workers there...

7 · mb said:

Gordon--trust me, I've met her, she's real. And she was very nice. And I'm with Monkey...I somehow have a problem thinking of her ogling construction workers.

8 · lizz said:

Why doesn't she think there'll be worthy hunks for Shauna as well?

9 · Witold said:

beautiful!...

10 · Graham said:

Thew. Just as well she didn't tell you about the "crossing the equator for the first time" ceremony!

Mind you, my mum isn't so great at airports either.

11 · Mark said:

Woohoo! More crazy colonials in the UK. Have a great time with her :)

12 · agica said:

You never breathed a word that the Mothership was coming! Whoa.
All hail the Mothership! Seriously, I hope she'll have a nice time. (and you too, of course)

13 · shauny said:

agica, my chief weapon is surprise! hehe :)

14 · Rob said:

Couldn't help but smile at the end of this entry. Terrific job, Shauny.

15 · Caitlin said:

I've always wondered why tanning studios all appear in clusters.

(and, why are there so many hairdressers on Morningside Road?)

16 · momo said:

Hehee. Too many cute statements in there to mention! Have a lovely time with your mama, Shauners. :)

17 · Miel said:

The famous and fabulous Mothership! Scotland look out!

18 · Ed said:

Are you putting Mothership up too? If so, waking up in another nation with relatives niggling over details will no doubt be a surreal experience. That ought to be worth a few fey reunions alone.

19 · kathryn said:

I bet you are thanking your lucky stars you weren't born a boy .. Ninian... yikes!

20 · kathryn said:

I bet you are thanking your lucky stars you weren't born a boy .. Ninian... yikes!

21 · Croila said:

"Hunks"? Here in Edinburgh? I think I have to go and get my eyes tested, as I seriously just don't see them! :-0

22 · kat said:

your mother cannot be *real*! you MUST have made her up... didn't you?!!!

23 · kat said:

your mother cannot be *real*! you MUST have made her up... didn't you?!!!

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The Eagle Has Landed was published on April 15, 2004.

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